Too Much Sex?

Hi Sexies!

I like sex. You’re here, so I’m guessing you like it, too.

Sex comes in many permutations and combinations. From multiple partners, to multiple fetishes, to (hopefully) multiple orgasms, there are many means of sexual expression.

This raises the question: is there such a thing as too much sex?

There was one particularly kinky weekend that started with one man and his toys and quickly grew to… But that’s a story for another time.

As a writer, I mean, more specifically, is there such a thing as too much sex in the stories you read? Is a smattering of sexual relationships enough to satisfy or do you prefer the characters to be randy sluts?

And how far should the sexual activities go? Kissing, while arousing when done correctly, would be, to my thinking, on the low end of the erotica scale.

How graphic should the descriptions be?

Purple prose, whereas it may be poetic, seems pretty lame to me. When I read erotica, I want to be able to get into the mood being experienced by the characters, rather than figuring out what the bleep the author is trying to convey. The succulent aroma of her sweet nectar drove him deeper within her mysterious blossoming flower. What? He’s a gardener? Is this penetration or oral? Euphemisms are one thing; being cryptic is another.

It reminds me of the woman who arrived home excited about shopping at Good For Her. “They’ve got flavoured contraceptive foam!*” she squealed.

“Really?” Her partner was intrigued.

“Yeah,” she answered. “Strawberry, chocolate, vanillaโ€“”

“So, what flavour did you buy?” her lover enquired, relishing the thought of a new taste sensation while muff diving.

“Tuna!” she replied, proving how easy it is to misunderstand a situation.

On the other end of the speculum, I mean, spectrum, there are descriptions usually equated with pornography. These are the blunt words. The dirty words. The words that would get your mouth washed out with soap if your mother heard you say them as opposed to reading them in the latest copy of Pillow Talk hidden under the Bible in her night stand. You know the words I mean. Even these words run the gamut from mild to overtly offensive. Pussy, at least I think, is a fairly tame word. And I like cock. (No, really, ask around. I really like cock.) Perhaps it has to do with the level of arousal in the characters. Romantic love play by the fire might involve tame, more poetic descriptors. Hard and horny going at it in the back of a pool hall would use more earthy words. From the cerebral to the animal.

With all this in mind, I have decided to do a couple of things: 1. Ask you, hot reader, what your preferences are; and 2. Provide you with both fascinating stories and scintillating smut. Sometimes we want lots of foreplay. Other times we just want to get slammed up against the nearest wall and taken. So, whether you want slow and romantic, or fast and dirty, stick around for some highly arousing literature.

Now it’s your turn to fess up. When you read erotica, what kinds of words push your hot buttons?

Happy Horniness,


*Contraceptive Foam is a birth control method. It is a vaginally inserted spermicide. You can get spermicide at Good For Her:


10 responses to “Too Much Sex?

  1. I’ve been thinking about this post since I first saw it. I’ve given it some serious consideration. What do I find erotic or what do I like about the sex that I read in books. I don’t think there can be “too much sex” in books. Given the scenario’s or context can be difficult. I do admit that I haven’t read much erotica lately. But the books that I have read are adult. I did read the 50 Shades of Grey series. When everyone was talking about it I just had to check it out. I have to admit that I was disappointed by the end of the third book. I was looking for the S&M or BDSM, or something that I had never read about before. And unfortunately what I read in the 50 Shades series I’ve read in other books. I guess I’m looking for that ‘wow blushing as I read’ it factor. Something that would fuel my fantasies. I like to keep an open mind. And like you said Toni some authors glaze over the sex or try to make it into poetry. As for how graphic, well I find the more graphic it is the better I can visualize what the author/authoress is trying to convey. As for what words push my button’s, I like them all! Who cares if someone thinks it’s smut. If I like it then I like it. I know I kind of babbled here but as I said I’ve been mulling over this for a few days now and thought I should respond before I lost my nerve LOL!! I look forward to more of your work!!!

    • Thank you for your detailed reply, Colleen, and please feel free to babble anytime! I must agree that I get a bit irked if I buy a book labelled as erotica and there’s hardly any sex in it. Why ELSE would I buy a ‘sex book’ if not for the sex?? I’m glad you enjoyed my work! What a relief! Now to hear if everyone else enjoyed it too!

    • I agree with Colleen with what she said. I find that the words used help to set and intensify a scene. If it is a romantic scene, use softer word, if it is a hardcore sex scene, use dirty words. I love what Colleen said about looking for a story that makes her blush while reading it, I feel the same way when reading erotica. I also love reading a book that introduces me to something new. Maybe some position I had never thought of, or some new kink to try lol.
      I am loving your work Toni, and cant wait to red more! Keep up the good work doll

      • Thanks Mel! I really appreciate your comments ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s great to know that readers want to experience new things too when reading, and even better if some try out those new things ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • I know what you mean Mel. It might be a little off topic here, but I’m still looking for that read that will scare the hell out of me!! If it had erotica in it as well that would be double the wicked awesomeness!!!

        • Hi Colleen. Do you mean scare in the sense of it would be scary to try in real life, or scary in the sense of a totally diabolical plot and action/sex scenes? I’ve actually been thinking of trying my hand at horror erotica – sex and fear seem to mix so well in the movie world, but I’m not sure how well they mix in the writing world. Any thoughts on that?

          • Hi Toni,
            I guess what I’m looking for is a scare in the sense that it’s a thrill. I love horror stories, whether it be movies, books, or reality show’s. Something to try in real life or just to read. I love good diabolical plot that has a good amount of sex/action in it. Gore doesn’t bother me, but I’m still new to the whole erotica scene and know that I’m not into things like scat, golden showers, cutting, necrophilia etc. I’d love to see what you come up with!!

            • The book I’m working on at the moment isn’t a horror, but it could be classified as a paranormal erotic thriller/action. Hopefully that’ll give you some tense moments, at least! I, too, draw the line at scat, golden showers, cutting and necrophilia!

  2. I am completely with Colleen on the horror thing. I also love my horror. Again, like Colleen, I am new to erotica and before I found erotica, horror was pretty much all I would read. I would love to read something in the horror genre that you might write Toni, but of course, with erotica also in it. Im with you both about the scat and golden showers, but I have to be honest and say that when it comes to reading, cutting, bloodplay or necrophilia would enhance a story for me as it could be seen as horror. I also love paranormal stuff so for me, something that included paranormal elements, horror and erotica would be my perfect read!

    • Then I have my next writing project after my current series! Thank you both for your input. The idea of mixing horror and sex is more appealing than I thought it would be ๐Ÿ™‚

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